Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Now what?

I started this blog for several reasons. One, I like to write and be creative. Two, I feel like I am in this weird transition period in my life and I know I'm not the only one. Three, I'm a former beauty queen, and I have some pretty funny things to talk about.

So here's the rundown. I spent the last 6 years of my life trying to be Miss America. I got close to a state title, but it never happened. Like many other pageant girls, being Miss America was my dream, and preparing for that job took over my life. In college, I skipped social functions with the girls to do community service. I skipped the pizza on Grey's nights at my house and opted for air popped popcorn with no butter (via my trainers orders). I spent hours in the gym, never got to go on Spring Break, and my mom and I haven't been on a family vacay in 6 summers.  Now, don't get my wrong, I am fully aware that I did all these things by choice - but it was what I thought I needed to do to win, and I don't regret any of those decisions. I think I am a better person for my years of competing - and I credit a lot of who I am today because of my time competing in the Miss America Organization. I wouldn't know a lot of my best friends, I wouldn't have had some of the opportunities I was granted, and my skin would probably not be as tough either.

But - because I opted to make being Miss America my first priority, I forgot to focus on what the heck I was planning to do with my life once competing was over. I guess I always thought that after I won a state title, opportunites would open up for me - it never crossed my mind that I wouldn't win b/c that wasn't an option in my head. Unfortunately, that's where I am now. Although I could have competed again this year, I chose not to. I have a rule about competing in pageants: when it stops being fun, stop competing. And that's what I did.

So - I moved to Knoxville with my best friend Ashley last fall on a whim - I just thought I needed a change. I got a job working in development, and although I'm overjoyed to have a job in this economy, I don't think development is what I want to do for the rest of my life. But here in lies my next problem - I wanted to be Miss America - that was my career goal. I also want to be a recording artist - but again, that is another career that requires a lot of luck. (right place, right time, right set of judges) So I'm trying to figure out what to do with my life! Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated! My mind changes everyday - singer, teacher, PR Exec, Fashion Buyer, grad school, law school, boutique owner...this list could continue on and on... so for now I'm going to do what Dolly Parton sings about, and work 9-5, blog, consult on the side (will discuss in a future blog), get back in shape, and try to figure out what the heck to do now that I've been de-throwned....

Until next time...


  1. i love you. i am so excited about this!

  2. i feel you! i'm in a major job hunt myself right now, trying to find something in the wedding industry (which is challenging because almost every planning company is primarily employed by the owner... very little full-time opportunities it seems!) before my eight weeks left in school are up! it's a challenge, but that's life.

    i have confidence in your ability to find something you're super-passionate about, love, and find fulfilling. it's good that you have something now to pay the bills (and it seems like you still have enough free time to do fun potential-careersy-things on the side!). just keep trying new things and you'll figure it all out. :)